Paper Roll Panic

Panic has always the power to blur our mind and make us overlook some rather important details. After the assault on the shelves in search of food, soon it was realized that the human body, in addition to filling up, has a second fundamental need too: that of emptying. One more opportunity for people to discover they have a seemingly insatiable desire to stockpile — even when manufacturers say there is no shortage.

Supermarkets in Australia are largely selling out of toilet paper due to novel coronavirus fears. An Australian newspaper even printed out eight extra pages in a recent edition to serve as emergency toilet paper. Casey Hyde, a blind woman from Melbourne, said she’s had toilet paper stolen from her trolley by panicked supermarket shoppers, while Chris and Haidee Janetzki, a couple from Toowoomba, who accidentally spent over $3.000 on 2.306 rolls, now are glad they did it as the virus panic buying hit their country. They have even built a throne with their spoils, announcing from up there: “We are flying high. We are sitting pretty, we are loaded with toilet paper. In fact we think we are royalty now, check out our throne for our toilet paper Queen.”

And the Internet, as usual, did not miss the opportunity to laugh about it.